Archive | July, 2010

“My Other Half Isn’t…Anyone That Thrives On Drama”

13 Jul

When a Bon Jovi song doesn’t help ease my aggravation, there is obviously something wrong.

You know the saying, “when it rains it pours”?  Well its a damned torrential downpour over on my side of the tracks.

First of all, I am absolutely tired of the drama that comes with girls.  It’s like a never-ending argument that just spins in circles and never gets to a new point.  You know that trip to Virginia?  A month later and we are STILL arguing over it.  It like a deadly virus that has affected each and every friendship that was exposed to that trip.

Moving on…

I like to ask you guys an opinion on something.  If you go out of your way to be a pain in someone’s ass with little joking remarks, once you get a reaction, would you spend the rest of the day ignoring them?

Yesterday was my company outing.  Now I PROMISED my friend that I was going to avoid Robert in an effort to move on, date new people and make new friends. In her words, “Say a polite hello and after five minutes excuse yourself and mingle with other people.”

Fabulous idea…in theory.

I get there and set up shop with some girls at the office and I am mingling.  Then, he gets there and (like old times) I get funny faces thrown at me.  I throw one back and immediately those stupid butterflies start having a party and I immediately begin to think that just MAYBE things are getting back to normal.

But, I PROMISED that I would mingle and avoid people.  Plus, I’m certainly not that girl who completely forgets things just because you give her a second of attention.

I politely get up and tell the girls that I’m heading to the pool and he immediately says some annoying remark which leads into 3 minute back and forth banter…just like old times.

That’s it. The rest of the day he spent hanging out with his boys while I spent it wandering around alone around the golf course. (Oh, and yes I did mingle with other people by the way) As for avoiding, it seemed that the more I tried to avoid, the more I would accidentally bump into him.  Then every time I did, he would make some moronic remark and then go on his merry way with his friends.

Listen, I do like the banter and the teasing.  That’s great but usually that leads into normal conversation and now its just this awkward kind of thing.  Is this like when you’re in grade school and if a boy likes you he pulls your hair and pinches you?  I mean, if that’s the case, wouldn’t after the third run in, he would excuse himself from his guy friends and hang with me for a bit?

I will admit that as much as I was putting myself out there to date other people I really was hoping that things would kind of go back to the way they were before.

I think yesterday just killed any hope I had for that.  I’m all for hanging out with your friends (I’m very pro choose your friends over a person you’re dating/seeing/crushing on/etc) but even if it were a case of him hanging with them and sending me a text once in a while, that would have been fine.

This is definitely a case of “He’s just not that into you” don’t you think?

Anyway, as for my search for Mr. Right out on the web, I’m making a few dates for this week and next so hopefully I’ll have some interesting stories for you guys soon enough.

On some good news, I’ve paid for my driving lessons and will being learning the rules of the road ASAP!  I actually have to call today to schedule my classes.  I am very excited to be doing some new that’s for MYSELF.

This week my best friend Angie is coming to visit.  She is the only person in the world who knows each and every corner of my mind.  You know how Steven Tyler and Joe Perry were the toxic twins? Well, she and I were the toxic twins as for as emotional turmoil and bad luck.  I’m meeting her for lunch and hopefully for some Taylor Swift karaoke later on tonight.  Nothing like saying, “I’m over you and I’m ready to meet someone great” like  a few bars of “You belong with me”….

My Other Half Isnt….A Mike “The Situation” Wannabe

2 Jul

On Monday I officially joined match.com and I am trying to keep an open mind about this.  According to those commercials, with the happy couples and the cheesy instrumental music in the background, my other half could be waiting on this site.

Maybe he is but I can tell you one thing.  My other half is not one of the MANY guys whose shirtless in their profile picture.

Yes, there are actually guys who think its hot to pose with their shirts off.  Does this really get women to throw emails of affection towards you?  It’s one thing if I’m already dating you and you want to send me a picture that’s fine.  But it is a whole other case when you think you are ‘The Situation” posing on the red carpet and I don’t even know your name.

Also, if you are really trying to look for a committed relationship, why would you post a picture with a drink in your hand and your eyes glazed over?  My personal favorite was a guy that posed with his friend who was PASSED out.  I know when I think husband material I automatically think of the words “Alcoholic” and “Beer Pong King”. 

Its humorous.

My personal favorite is the guys who go on match.com and are completely picky.  One guy actually listed the things you couldn’t have in your profile if you wanted to email him.  Things like “i love to laugh” apparently irked him.  You know what irked me about Mr. “Let me list what’s wrong with you before I get to know you”?  The face that he was SO picky you would think that he was George Clooney.  Well, let me be the first to tell you that George he was NOT.

Oh, and then we have the guys that can’t read.  For an age range I put that I am looking for a guy from 25-30 years old.  I didn’t realize that that age range included 42,51,39,etc etc.  Some people are into older guys and that’s fine.  But if I were into older guys that were that age, I wouldn’t have limited the age to 30.  This just goes to show they are looking at the picture and NOT the profile.  That is probably more annoying than Mr Picky, Mr. I have a six-pack so let me show it off and Mr. Let me show you how to funnel vodka.

Also the usernames these people have is ridiculous.  Iamsexy99 is NOT sexy.  Also with a username like that you better make sure you look like Gerard Butler.  You don’t?  Then I suggest NOT using that as a username.  It just gets worse with Guy4U and McLovin’. 

If the usernames weren’t bad enough the headlines are cringe worthy.  Do you know that someone actually put, “Young, Good Looking and Rich”.  Granted, its attention-getting but any guy who has to mention his bank account within the first five seconds of you seeing them is tacky. 

Before you guys start raising eyebrows and accusing me of being too picky, let me just note that I have sent out a few “winks” and emails to potential dates.  I am genuinely trying.  I also knew that it wouldn’t be easy but I also didn’t think that I would have more jokes than promising leads.  This is just a sad situation.

Anyway, ill keep you guys posted.  It’s the July 4th weekend and  I will be spending Saturday at the beach and my night watching Eclipse.  Even though the nice guys in my real life turn into confusing morons, its nice to know you can depend on a romantic vampire to entertain you.